[this entry was written as an application for Kiva Fellows program 2012 ... which I did not make]
"For as long as space endures, and for as
long as living beings remain, until then may I too abide to dispel the misery
of the world." These are beautiful words from Bodhisattva that have stayed
with me through the years. Or shall I
cite the Christian teaching “love your neighbor as you love yourself?” I see a tangible way of following those
teachings in working as a Kiva Fellow.
Last summer, I hit bottom.
It was ironic, because I should have been on top of the world. I was graduating with a MBA degree from a
top-tier business school. I was earning
six-figures. I was going to marry a
beautiful doctor. And I was climbing a
12,000-foot Mt. Adams in the western US state of Washington.
a pit stop on the way up to Mt. Adams - a beautiful day! |
I summited Mt. Adams on a beautiful, blue, July day. I climbed down, exhausted, but high with excitement
from the climb. I returned home to my
gal. She sat me down. She was stern-faced. And she said that she no longer loved me and
could not be with me. I was shocked. No explanations. In the subsequent days, I had to move out, was
overcome with confusion, and felt completely abandoned. I had moved 3,000 miles from North Carolina to Portland, Oregon to be with this gal. And now what? I had hit the bottom. I lay on the floor, stared at the empty
ceiling in a stuffy room, and thought to myself, “Okay, universe. You win, I give up.”
And that’s when I realized I was nothing. Yes, I have helped others before. Yes, I have shared 100 Kiva loans (my profile page), and have participated
in other peer lending programs. Yes, I
have supported social causes, so on and so forth, but because it seemed the
proper thing to do. After my personal
suffering, I keenly felt others’ pain. I
ached with the brokenhearted. I hungered
with the hungry. I mourned with those
grieving a loss. And I didn’t want to go
through the same motions. I gave up my
well-paying, but soul-sucking job and moved from Portland to the Bay Area. I wanted to
create something new, something useful, something beautiful. I knew those kinds of creators lived in the
Bay Area. I am seeking, and I want
to help others as I journey along my path. That is why I am applying to be a Kiva
Fellow. I had wanted to do so for a long
time, but until now, I lacked the courage, the motivation.
I am applying for an Anglophone opportunity. As I am new to this area, I would prefer
a local fellowship – but I am flexible! I would be interested in contributing to
entrepreneurial causes and innovation efforts at Kiva.
For example, is there a way to disrupt the rates of pay-day
lending? How could we disrupt the chain
of events that lead to huge gaps in financial literacy between one population
and another within our own community?
Could Kiva build on financial lending platform to add other services and
products to enhance the value of the offering?
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